Is there a moment in which we recognize that we are no longer happy in our own lives? Or does it creep in and we are just reacting to a circumstance that we feel we can no longer change? Does it take over when we are not paying attention? Is ever such a thing as ''too late'' to do something about it?
Are there any cues we can look for, so that we bare the minimum preparation? Or are we consciously deciding to ignore the signs, hoping they will go away? Are we afraid of bringing it forth, before it’s to late? — and…. when is it, too late?
When do relationships go sour? It is a classic case of … ”Where the attention goes, the energy flows!” , and once our attention is being distracted, the relationships decay? May this be a relationship with your partner, your passion, your hobbies, your God, your family...
What happens when we change and we are no longer in alignment with our previous preferences and expectations ? When is the moment to recognize that there has been a misalignment and it is time to either re align or move on?
And… what is we believe that the perceived effort required to realign the relationship is not worth the effort? Is there such things as ”not worth the effort?”. Do we move on and take some of the past mistakes with us ? What if we move on and it proves that it was the worst decision of our lives? …
A lot of questions! Definitely more questions than answers. Could it be that we are not asking the right questions? What if the only question worth answering is actually a very simple one. What if with this one question we can get the clarity we so desperately need?
And the question I will suggest for today is as follows: Given everything that was said and done, can I still honestly make this other person happy?
Think about it for a minute. As it is no longer about you, not directly anyway, but it is about how you can rise up to the occasion and stretch to be the person that they love, cherish and honor, with no pressure, no guilt, no conditions, no pain.
The question the becomes… Can I provide, can I alleviate, can I love and serve as the other person deserves ? Am I still bringing joy into their lives and laughter in their hearts?
I suggest that if we cannot provide nurture, love, empathy, support …. then perhaps we are the villain in the story, and we need to take a log and hard look within.